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Introduction to the Series: 3 Ways You Create Conflict and Destroy Trust and How to Fix Them

Professional Woman

Professional Woman

Most people experience conflict on a daily basis, and while not all conflict is bad, most people perceive the conflict they’re experiencing to be of the bad variety. In order to provide practical tips for ways to reduce conflict and enhance trust, I’ll provide those tips in a series of articles. This is the introduction….

I regularly ask attendees to my programs and events this question: What percentage of time do you spend in conflict while at work? In almost every case, 20% (or 1 day per week) is identified as the average time an individual spends in conflict at work. What most people tend to forget is that conflict is like cholesterol – there is good conflict and bad conflict. So I always ask a follow up question – what percent of the 20% is bad conflict? The usual answer is 90% – still roughly a day per week. The cost of bad conflict is enormous for any organization – you can estimate it by simply determining the total cost of all employees’ salaries and benefits, breaking that number down into a daily cost, and multiplying the daily cost by 52 days. Needless to say, it will be a BIG cost and a huge drain on profits.

Aside from the cost, the important question is this – why do we spend so much time in bad conflict? The answer may surprise you – even make you mad at me. You are the source of most conflict in your life. Now, before you decide this article series has no merit – read on – there are 3 ways you create conflict and destroy trust.

1. Your Preferences

2. Your Judgments and Perceptions

3. Your Expectations

The good news is I’m going to tell you how to correct all 3 of them so that you can tip the scale back in a favorable position and reduce the cost to your organization and the cost to your emotional well being. While the articles don’t have to be read in sequence, I would suggest you start by reading Series Article #1: Three Ways You Create Conflict and Destroy Trust: Your Preferences. It sets the stage very nicely by providing some critical insights into the person you have to deal with the most – you.

Click on the links below to begin reducing conflict and enhancing trust in your relationships at work and at home.

Series Article #1: Three Ways You Create Conflict and Destroy Trust: Your Preferences

Series Article #2: Three Ways You Create Conflict and Destroy Trust: Your Judgments and Perceptions

Series Article #3: Three Ways You Create Conflict and Destroy Trust: Your Expectations of Others

 
Comments

Great series Sardek – I find it particularly interesting the way that “bad conflict” is quantified as a cost in dollars as well as stress and negative work experiences. Frightening actually!
Thanks for your guidance and thoughts.

Thanks Cris! Conflict has a price, and for leaders who don’t know how to manage it or who cause it unnecessarily, it definitely becomes a hidden cost of poor leadership. Much appreciate your comments and compliments!

I love the third article best. The first point of the Scout Law is a Scout is Trustworthy. Numero uno. There’s a reason – if you’re not trustworthy, how can anything else you say or do be trusted? I’d love to see more discussions on how to fix conflict and restore trust – maybe your next series!

Howard,
Thanks for the compliment and feedback! I sincerly appreciate it. Everything rises and falls on trust, and I agree, this is a topic that will continue to receive my attention, as is evident in the article I posted today – how to know if you can trust someone. In future articles, I will also touch upon how to enhance trust, and per your request, I will also continue sharing tips and strategies for conflict resolution. Thanks again for the awesome feedback!

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